Shed clearing day

Today is 'clearing out the shed' day.

This has probably been brought on because Keith has killed another computer and is awaiting a new power pack for it, so in the meantime, he has the one from upstairs, which means that the corner of the living room and the study are both awash with cables, leads and other detritus. In addition, he has been working on my old laptop (Did I mention that I now have a shiny new red one?) and this has led to another mess all over the dining table. 

To add insult to injury, he then announced yesterday that he wanted to get his model aeroplane and helicopter out of the shed, presumably to spread them over the small remaining tidy areas of the house. Surprisingly, when he noticed the expression on my face, he quickly thought better of it.

So, today is 'clearing out the shed' day and 'building a new workbench within' day but it has also turned out to be 'mending the shed roof' day, as the squirrels have been chewing away at the roof felt, with predictable results. It never rains but it pours - in both senses of the phrase.

I did try to help with the clearing out but soon got sent back indoors due to my extreme reactions to the horrible, massive, revolting spiders lurking on everything I went near. If you heard any screams of terror in your neighbourhood, wherever that might be, as you undoubtedly will have, it was me. 

And I make no apology for that!

A misunderstanding

Just got this in my inbox from Dale and I just had to share it!

Ice Cream Sandwich anyone?

For some reason, I am unable to use email or the internet on my HTC HD2 mobile phone, unless I switch it to wifi. This is all the more puzzling as, a few weeks ago, our phone provider contacted Keith and said that I had been using data but I didn't have that option in my package, although for an extra £5 a month, I could have pretty well all I wanted, so Keith paid up. Since then, even though I don't know how I was downloading data before, I certainly can't now; nor can I send or receive multi-media messages. I have spent hours poring over the laptop in search of enlightenment, giving myself a headache and becoming cross-eyed in the process, but nothing has worked, so now, Keith has bravely offered to re-flash my phone with Ice Cream Sandwich instead of Gingerbread.

Confused? Yep! Me too, but I've got my fingers crossed that it works.
Keith doesn't have a problem with his phone - he has just awarded himself a Samsung Galaxy 3...

Anyone for a gallop?

This is Younger Daughter, aka Claire on her pony, Star. Claire has been riding since she was about eleven and has been horse-mad ever since, even though it has led to her sustaining a broken collar bone in her teens and, recently, a broken finger. 

But may I draw your attention to the perfectly straight back and excellent posture - it's all in the genes, you see!

(She doesn't speak welsh though...)

Cymraeg again

On Wednesday, I was very brave. I went to a welsh conversation group at the local hostelry. One of the tutors runs it every Wednesday evening through the school holidays, so, as my tutor was going, I decided to go too. As it happened, I was the only 'first year' there. The others were fourth or sixth year, so well ahead of me, albeit very friendly and encouraging.

However, I did find myself doing my 'rabbit in the headlights' act quite a lot. This is because, whenever someone said something to me I had to:

1. mentally translate what they had said
2. decide what my answer would be
3. translate said answer into welsh (vocabulary knowledge permitting)
4. check that I had any mutations right
5. if a 'yes' was needed, decide which  was the appropriate one. (welsh has quite a few).

On the plus side, listening to the general conversation, I did manage to understand/guess most of what was being said, so not all bad.

And I have agreed to go again next week.

Ever the glutton for punishment!

Thanks again, TK

Several days ago as I left a meeting at a hotel; I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down.

I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.

Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.

My wife has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.

My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them.

Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the door, I came to a terrifying conclusion.

Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all, "Honey," I stammered; I always call her "honey" in times like these.

"I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen."

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard her voice.

"Idiot," she barked, "I dropped you off!"

Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me."

She retorted, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car."

Yep it's the golden years.

 

G4S and operations

The more cynical among us, and I definitely include myself in that number, are probably not very surprised at this news that G4S are not going to be able to deliver the goods on security for the Olympic farce Games. I am equally not surprised that they apparently didn't realise that this was the case until just over a week ago and definitely not surprised that it hadn't registered with the CEO. Nick Buckles. We only have to look at the recent fiascos with the banks for confirmation that, even if they do know what's going on in their organisation, they sure as hell ain't gonna admit it.
However, the interview with said Mr Buckles on Radio 4 yesterday morning raised the bar to new heights of amazement. In fact, I stayed in bed for an extra ten minutes just to hear it to the end.
Mr Buckles, it must be said, would put many a politican to shame with his ability to evade the question and parrot his pre-prepared speech
"We agreed to uptake our requirement from 2000 to 10000," he said at one point. Which means precisely what? When did this kind of nonsensical, meaningless drivel become the norm in interviews?
Four thousand people had been trained and deployed, whilst another nine thousand were 'being sheduled,' which means what? Apparently it meant that they were 'in the pipeline.' Any clearer? No, thought not.
Throughout the interview, Mr Buckles kept insisting that this was 'a highly complex recruitment operation' and brushed off any suggestion that G4S might have been trying to cut costs by employing too few people for the recruitment process. "We're not making any money from this," he insisted, "we will lose between £30,000 and £50,000."
Then there was the question about whether or not all the security personnel being employed could speak english. He was 'fairly sure' they could but also 'supposed' that not all personnel would come into direct contact with the public anyway, but he wasn't sure. I am sure that, on a reported annual  salary of £1.2 million, he damned well ought to be sure - about everything!
In his TV interview, Mr Buckles did offer a brief apology to the military personnel who are going to have to step into the breach but I certainly didn't hear any apology in the radio interview, although he did mutter something about being 'grateful' to them, which is fairly meaningless as they have no choice in the matter.
The best suggestion I have heard since yesterday morning is that Mr Buckles and the rest of his band of highly paid executives, should give up their bonuses to be allocated to the soldiers who will have to deal with the chaotic mess they have created.
Don't hold your breath though.
Meanwhile, I am going to uptake my requirement from coffee to coffee and a biscuit!

Oh and just to encourage you to check that today is not April !st,  BBC Breakfast reported this morning that there is a move to ensure that operations done on patients will be carried out by people who are qualified doctors and surgeons.
So that's all-right then. Keith is disappointed though. He had hoped that auto-locksmithing to brain surgeon would be a natural career progession.