"Is your husband rude and abrupt by nature?" I asked his wife, "or did he have to go to charm school to get so good at it?"
OK, no, I didn't say that, but I wanted to. Politeness costs nothing, but I hope he heard me as I took a leaf out of his book and muttered, "Idiot!" to myself as I locked up the car.
We sold it today to a very nice man who thought it was a bargain but it did occur to me that perhaps it would not be advisable for me to consider a career on the garage forecourt.
Meanwhile, I have finished decorating our new lavatory and it looks very smart if I do say so myself. The walls, while painted in a tasteful shade of cream, do look a little bare. I wondered whether some graffiti would jazz it up a bit - you know, the usual sort of lavatorial stuff, well, maybe not absolutely the usual - something innocuous, along the lines of
"Cloth Ears woz 'ere" or "No more cake for Keith!" and "Down with skool!" alongside a few cartoon drawings.
I ran the idea past Keith.
He wasn't keen. No artistic soul, that man!