"Well, there is only one piece of advice I can give you," said the wisest of wise men. "The secret of happiness is to see all the marvels of the world and never to forget the drops of oil on the spoon."

('The Alchemist' Paulo Coelho)

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Text messages

When I take Paddy out for a walk, I wear trousers, jogging bottoms, whatever, but they have to have deep pockets. This is so that I can carry tissues, treats for the times when Paddy actually manages to walk past another dog without having an attack of hysterics, poo bags (self-explanatory) and my two mobile phones, one being my personal one for use in case I am suddenly attacked by a manic axe murderer (well, you never know) and the other being my 'work' phone. When the message tone on that one beeps, I can be fairly sure it will be from a client wanting to cancel an appointment or having forgotten the time of said appointment, but today, it was different.
The message read, "Hi, how are u. Wot u up to this mornin?"
As no-one I know is that into textspeak, I could be fairly sure that this was not from a client, not even one who wanted an appointment at short notice, so I ignored it and carried on walking.
Minutes later, the phone beeped again.  "Where r u mate?"
I considered texting back to put the sender out of his misery by informing him that I was not his mate, but I didn't, at least, not until we got home when I sent a text saying, "I'm afraid you have the wrong number"
to which I got an immediate reply: "R u not rod then?"
"No" I replied. The novelty was wearing off by now.
"Who r u then?" was the next message.
I was tempted to reply "Not Rod" but decided against it. Surely if I ignored him, he would finally get the message. How hard can "I'm afraid you have the wrong number" be to understand?
But no, our friend was not ready to give up yet.
"R u a lady?"
Yessss! Recognition at last!


  1. U seem 2 av mzundastud mi text this mornin Jeknee. I nivver sed anyfink abowt no rod.I sed av U got di dog wid you! Av yoo binta Specsavers?

  2. Ha! So it was you, YP! I mite ave known, innit!

  3. Laydee srly? Av bn blgng abt txtn 2. Sorta.

  4. Wotcha, SP. will avta pop over n av a luk. ;)

  5. Nva bst m8 ru sz8 brrr fc cooo la?

  6. Sorry, YP, you've really lost me this time!

  7. That's probably because it was a Serbo-Croat text message.

  8. "Dyna cafflo" is Welsh - not Serbo-Croat Jenny!

  9. This is certainly true, YP but then I don't have your intimate knowledge of Serbo-Croat, I'm afraid. ;)
    (I can say 'thank-you' in Latvian though.)



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