"Well, there is only one piece of advice I can give you," said the wisest of wise men. "The secret of happiness is to see all the marvels of the world and never to forget the drops of oil on the spoon."



('The Alchemist' Paulo Coelho)




Thursday, June 10, 2010

Football fever

I don't always follow the news and current affairs that closely, but I have the feeling that, somewhere, some time recently, I have heard mention of the World Cup. It only seems like five minutes since the last one, but, hey, life's too short to quibble. Anyway, it occurred to me that there are going to be more than a few wives, partners and girlfriends out there who will spend the next few weeks tiptoeing around, providing constant supplies of food and beverages and being deprived of any choice whatsoever on daily TV viewing. In addition, they will be expected to rally round, offering consolation and copious boxes of tissues when the results are bad and, most importantly, refrain from saying, "Well, it's only a bunch of idiots kicking a bladder of wind around a field, darling!"
Now all this emotional support is bound to take its toll, so I thought it would be a good business opportunity for me to offer counselling to all football widows for the duration. No, really, it's the least I can do!
However, offering bereavement counselling for the fans in the unthinkable event that England will lose ...
No, sorry, that's a step too far.
Well, I'd have to care, you see!

5 comments:

  1. Are qualified counsellors allowed to be blatantly sexist? My Shirley and my mate's wife - Fiona will be glued to The World Cup as much as we will. Yet in our local pub I know several blokes who are just not into football and never have been. So there! (YP blows thirty second raspberry and Jenny retreats singing "Three Lions on the shirt...")

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  2. I have to agree with Yorkie. Mrs P is as keen on footie as I am.

    Having said that, she is away in Wales this weekend with a few non-footie mates to enjoy the walking, although she is taking a radio along to tune into the match on Saturday night.

    And from a mercenary perspective, I suspect you'd get many more clients from traumatised England fans.

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  3. Well, YP, you should know me well enough by now to know that I like to be deliberately povocative now and again! ;)
    SP I hope Mrs P has a lovely weekend and maybe I will follow your advice and open up my counselling services to traumatised England fans - of course, that presupposes that England is not going to do well...

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  4. Jenny...England is definitely not going to do well. You'll clean up!

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  5. Good, I could do with a bit of extra income, Steve!

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