New car - old radio

I have changed my car. No longer the elderly Audi Estate which was heavy on the juice and had started to burn oil, now I have a petite Peugeot 106 Graduate deisel. It's also fairly elderly but sports distinctive, decorative twirly bits on the sides. This is important. The Audi had CPU Direct Computers Ltd along each side so I was always able to find it quite easily in carparks when I had forgotten just where I had parked, so I am hoping that the twirly bits on the Peugeot will fulfil the same function.
Where I do have a slight problem is with the radio. It's there, loosely attached in its niche but it doesn't work. That's not the problem though, as Keith has another one to replace it which just needs decoding, which he will be able to do, when he gets round to it.
"The radio fell out when I went round a corner today," I remarked to Keith on the phone.
"It fell on my hand," I continued.
"But I can't take it out altogether because the wires are still attached," I persisted.
"Ah, there's something you can do about that," came the response.
I waited, wondering what the 'something' was likely to be. Cut the wires? Stop going round corners?
"Get a piece of card and fold it,"came the instructions.
I braced myself for possible technical instructions to follow.
"Then wedge it down the side of the radio and it won't slip out again," said Keith with the air of a man confident that he had produced the perfect solution.
"Actually, I would rather just have the new one fitted...SOON!"
"Oh, are you sure?" came the hurt tones of a disillusioned man.

Losing weight

CM sent me this observation on married life today. Read on...

Here's a gem to share with your nearest and dearest........
There has been recent talk in the media about scientists pondering on the reason for females getting a little bit 'plumper' once they are married.
Theories thrown around include the fact that they are content, perhaps they are no longer on diets to catch the man of therir dreams and many more.
However, my favourite broadcaster Sir Terry Wogan this week came up with his own theory which I think is fantastic :
When single girls come home they go straight to fridge, see what's there, then go to bed. When married women come home they go straight to bed, see what's there, then go to the fridge ! ! !

Classic ! :-)

What a load of rubbish!

Apparently there are moves afoot to fine householders £110 if they put their rubbish out before the designated day of collection.
What I want to know is how much my refuse collectors will be fined when they empty my recycling box and then deliberately chuck it into next door's garden, as they did the other week!

Catch-up day

I was looking at the latest missive from Royal Mail about the changes in post pricing.
"It comes into effect on 21st August - a special day," I remarked.
Keith immediately assumed that hunted look which indicates that the significance of this day is something he should remember but doesn't.
"Something I should know about?" he asked desperately clutching at straws.
"Oh yes," I said.
He screwed up his face and gazed at the ceiling in the hope that inspiration might yet strike.
"Catch-up day?" he suggested hopefully.
"Catch-up day?" I queried.
"The day you become the same age as me again."
"That's the one," I said.