"Well, there is only one piece of advice I can give you," said the wisest of wise men. "The secret of happiness is to see all the marvels of the world and never to forget the drops of oil on the spoon."

('The Alchemist' Paulo Coelho)

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Slow moving traffic

Having had to negotiate yet more mobile cranes, slow lorries, tractors etc. on my journeys today, I have decided we need a new pressure group to free up the roads for those vehicles which can move at a reasonable speed during rush hours, which, these days seem to last most of the day.
So, sign up here to join S.M.O.O.T.H. alias Slow Moving Objects Off The Highway.
(Good, innit!!! Spent most of the journey to work this morning thinking that one up!)
Members of SMOOTH will have to undertake to throw sharpened knives at the tyres of any slow moving traffic they encounter on their journeys in order to disable them. They'll soon get the message!
Once they have got the message, there will be no need for the government's latest brainwave, which is to dedicate extra lanes for the use of cars carrying more than one person. 2 birds with one stone, see!
However, in the meantime, maybe it's time to get the blow-up doll out of the attic for the passenger seat so that we can use the dedicated lanes anyway. Come to that, one could put the doll in the driving seat and sit in the passenger seat in order to aim those knives more accurately at the tyres of the slow moving traffic. (Perhaps that is going a bit too far. Blame all this rubbish on a long, hard day at the chalkface!)


Anonymous said...

See forum for Keith's reply

Alan Saunders said...

Why do you have a blow-up doll in the attic?

gemmak said...

I have every sympathy with your daily traffic troubles. This posting is just sooooo funny tho'.... I haven't laughed so much in a long time! :o))

Jennyta said...

I thought a blow up doll in the attic would be better than a skeleton and more versatile!

Alan Saunders said...

You could take it into school for 'show and tell' :-D


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